Sunday, November 9, 2008

Flushing for the Future!

The greatest invention of Western Civilization? The printing press - nah! The internal combustion engine? Hell, no! Shaving cream? Why I oughta...

It's simple, every man out there will pull a Homer and slap his forehead with the force of spiritual revelation:

The toilet.

Yes, the lowly, the lovely indoor toilet is the greatest invention of our often ridiculous and contradictory and crazy Western civilization.

Think about it. Besides giving us a comfy place to read while crapping, the indoor toilet revolutionized how we deal with our waste. It carries it away from our homes on little tidal waves, into equally revolutionary public sanitation systems that keep our crap and piss out of the streets. The end result - less disease, fewer epidemics, a healthier and safer population.

Pretty cool. What if we could help the whole world to a toilet of their own? Check out this article about the need for a Flushing Revolution. We only need a celebrity spokesperson to kick start it.

May I suggest Jack Black? I'm not aware of any cause célèbre to which Mr. Black has attached himself and I can't think of any celebrity better suited to this toilet task.

Mr. Black, if you're out there, will you help us Flush for the Future (TM)?

Now playing: Wolfgang Dauner - Just Bring It Out
via FoxyTunes


Nazz Nomad said...

A few years ago, a friend of mine who's got about 8 years on me told me that sometimes a dump is far more satisfying than sex. I mocked him that day.
How wise he was and how foolish was I!

Memphis said...

I seem to remember years back Mr.Gomonkeygo bragging about having sex "at" a city dump.To this day he gets a gleem in his eye talking about "Taking Out The Trash".I may or may not have been involved.....or just one of his many discarded cans.