Monday, March 29, 2010

Bondage Family Values

Republicans are the gift that keeps on giving. You think they can't possibly get more messed up, more stupid, more hypocritical...but they can! And they do!

Of course, it helps when you have a PR-wiz like Michael Steele in charge of your national party machine. What, you say, what has Steele done now?

Nothin' much, just $2000 worth of wining and dining good old-fashioned Christian Republican donors at lesbian bondage strip clubs. Just good clean lesbian bondage strip-club family value fun, that's all! Did I mention the lesbian bondage strip club?

I know my newest troll won't believe any of this because he or she apparently doesn't believe anything in the media, but for those who want more laughs, check out this and this. It's so sweet it's schadenfreude-a-licious!

Does this matter? No. But it's freakin' funny as hell! It'll mean nothing to the brainwashed rightwing true believers. I mean, the wingnut brigade out there is still incensed about Obama's feet being on his own desk in his own office, for pete's sake! For some reason, it bothers them when the black man does it. Though when the white men did it, they were fine. Explain........waiting......nothing? Still nothing? Trying to find someway to say it's wrong without admitting you're a racist?

It's okay. I can wait. I'll just put my feet up on my desk...

UPDATE! BREAKING! Steele innocent! Or so he says. And I guess because he says so we gotta believe him, because when a Republican says something it's always true. Just ask Nixon.

SUPER-DUPER UPDATE! TOTALLY BROKEN! Steele FIRES staff member who digs lesbian bondage strip-club family fun time! Way to man up and take responsibility, Mike! You're the man! Are you going to fire yourself for that Hawaiian resort snafu next?

Oh...I cannot stop laughing about this. I really can't. I just hope they don't fire Mike because he's the surest path to victory for Dems in 2010. And we know he won't resign, so it's pink slip or nothing for him. If there's ever been a Republican values poster boy, it's Steele: unwilling to take responsibility for any action of his own or his subordinates (to whom we can only assume he sets the role model for behavior), lavishly out of touch with reality, dumb as a brick and mule-stubborn. It's like they cloned Bush's brain!

Friday, March 26, 2010


Holy Zombie Jesus!

Trolls! I've got trolls! Scary, name-calling anonymous trolls! Eeeeeeeeeeeeek!

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Yes, We Did

This would only be a better video if they spliced in a clip from Scanners at the know...exploding head-time.

Poor Boehner. I bet he thought he looked so courageous and filled with moral outrage.

All he really did was look like a jack-o-lantern throwing a tantrum.

In all seriousness, though, I do think Pumpkinhead represents something tangible here. He's the face of people afraid of losing their privilege and power, afraid of history and change, afraid of everything that doesn't look just like himself in the mirror. No wonder the neo-Nazis are feeling so liberated these days. Guys like Pumpkinhead are now publicly channeling all their sick masturbatory racial fear fetishes, right on the floor of the United States Congress. Good job, Johnny. Better hope they don't blame you for not stopping Obama. They turn easily.

Monday, March 22, 2010

All the Way to the Bank

I was screaming at Man-Crush Matthews when this was originally aired. I frightened the cats, I was so loud, so angry. I couldn't believe his arrogance during this interview.

Watching it again, I realized that it's not arrogance but fear. He doesn't understand the world anymore. Bloggers and the scary "netroots" are out there miles ahead of him, figuring out what's going in Washington and elsewhere and leaving his pasty old ass behind.

Beautiful. Matthews is about as useful as John McCain these days. I hope everyone at MSNBC sent him an email link to this today, to piss on his parade. But he probably doesn't do email. The Intertubes scare him.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Time to Switch?

QUESTION YOURSELF: If you are a Republican, can you support the party that thinks it is a reasonable thing for protestors to call members of the opposition party by foul racist and sexual slurs?

Think about it. That's exactly what Republican spokes-troll Rep. Devin Nunes of California thinks, speaking as a member of the party this morning in response to the sick verbal abuse inflicted by Tea-Baggers yesterday on Rep. Barney Frank and Rep. John Lewis.

Nunes actual words:
“When you use a totalitarian tactics, people, you know, begin to act crazy,” Nunes told C-SPAN’s Steve Scully Sunday morning when asked about the slurs. “I think that people have every right to say what they want. If they want to smear someone they can do it. It’s not appropriate--I think I would stop short of characterizing the 20,000 people protesting, that all of them were doing that.”
"Not appropriate" are the strongest words of condemnation Nunes can come up with.

Well. Okay. Then. By that standard, I guess it's perfectly okay to slander David Nunes as an illiterate, self-abusing, corpse-eating, Satan-worshiping, porn-addicted, wife-beating, dope-smoking flat-Earther. And charter member of NAMBLA.

Sorry. Yeah. That's going too far. Scratch "illiterate."

(John Lewis, BTW, is a heckuva nice guy and real American hero who was savagely beaten in 1961 in Montgomery while marching to end racial discrimination in this country. Fuck you if think otherwise. Barney Frank if you don't know is the second openly gay member of Congress and while I think he should occasionally think before speaking - as smart and amusing as he can be - I bet Frank would probably speak up in defense of a toad like Nunes if he were similarly abused by Democratic protestors. Again, fuck you...Seriously, I just don't care if you have an opposing opinion on this subject. I really don't.)

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Rock Hard - RIP (Repost)

Alex Chilton - Live at Berkeley Square, Berkeley, CA (6-22-85) 1 & 2
Alex Chilton - Live at the VFW Hall, Baton Rouge, LA (9-27-85) 1

Alex Chilton - Live at The Heartbreak Hotel, Languedoc, France (5-7-86) 1 & 2

March 18, 2010 - I heard the news today. First story on NPR when the alarm went off, I think it was. First I noticed. My eyes shot open when the announcer said "Alex Chilton..." because I knew it couldn't be anything good that was going to follow. I was still shocked when she actually said it, though. My Smart Wife and I both gasped and said "Oh, no!" at the same time. I think I swore too.

Thanks for everything Alex. I'm actually tearing up typing this. You've brought a lot of joy into our home and our hearts. Thanks for everything.

The following was originally posted here on February 16, 2009.

Like so much of the music that hit me right between my eyes and somehow also pierced my heart in my Golden Youth, Alex Chilton's came to me via a tape made by Oldest Brother. He put Bach's Bottom and Like Flies on Sherbert on it with some Cramps to fill 'er out. I didn't know what in the hell I was hearing, but it struck me as being somewhere between madness and brilliance in the giddy, throw myself at the walls way it made me feel. It was a new language to me, alien in its raw blueness and its lowdown drunken heartbeats. I didn't know how to hear this stuff. (A few years later Oldest Brother and the 'monkey had too many beers and spent a night singing - nay, screaming - along to "Take Me Home and Make Me Like It" in the kitchen of the apartment we shared).

And then Chilton had his 80s renaissance and not only was he recording but touring - huzzah! High Priest became a party album and a point of commonality between me and my friends who came to music via a different path (non-punk, classic rock and blues). And Chilton live was an awesome thing. I've never stopped hearing his totally wacked and extended solo on "Volare" from one of his O'Cayz gigs. My Smart Wife and I still go all glassy-eyed when we talk about it. (And if you are out there, guy who was next to me at that show, guy who had microphones on his baseball cap and wires going down into his shirt- release your tape! If the tape self-destructed, unable to contain such beauty, you are forgiven. If you are dead, you are forgiven. Otherwise, I will find you and you will pay for keeping this from the world for so long!)

Saw Chilton in Middleton, Wisconsin in 2000 at The Hotel which I think is gone now, probably an apartment building or something. Sweet show. Got all fanboy and asked for his autograph. He was a gentleman for sure. This was just before or after the show at Schuba's that's passed around a lot in trading circles. I don't recommend that show; the sound sucks. These kind of tinny, raw tapes from the 80s are much better. They really capture Chilton live.

Enjoy! Buy shit!

Postscript: I just found this on the YouTube...and it reminds me of the Chilton I loved. A total wise-ass! This has to be the very worst lip-synching job in history. And check out what the keyboard player is doing! Alex does manage to look cool even when his mouth isn't open and he's still magically singing.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Cry, Baby, Cry

Ahem. Cough, cough. Testing - 1, 2, 3 - Is this thing on?

To all the sorry-ass Republicans and Tea Bagging cretins - I have an economy-sized box of tissues for each and every one of you for when health care reform is passed into law. I know you'll need it. Only $50 bucks each, though I may have to deny snot-coverage to some based solely on my own tyrannical whims.

You're a bunch of whining, crying losers and your tears will flow like acid rain. I hope they burn as much too.

It's painfully obvious that you know you're going to lose this battle. And that by losing it, you are ensuring a Democratic majority in the Congress again after 2010 and probably a second term for Obama.

That's gotta hurt.

Scream treason, cry foul, have a tantrum, throw a fit, get drunk, drive off a cliff - do whatever you want to do, because it won't matter after health care reform becomes the law of the land. You're dead. You're meat.

Looking forward to the funeral, folks.