Saturday, August 29, 2009

Crazy Super Train

Glenn Beck is gonna tell us all what we can do. To stop the Obama "Oligarhy"!!!

Now, I don't know what an "oligarhy" is (though it's pronounced, according to Glenn, like a word that should be spelled "oligarchy" - go figure!) but I'm quakin' in my size 11 and a half, nearly triple-E boots. Actually, Birkenstocks, but boots if I owned some. Check it out...

I have to hand it to the little freak, though. He's really masterful at the fine art of riling scared folks up into a frenzy. I'm guessing nine-tenths of his viewers spent a couple hours trying to Google "Oligarhy" and when they couldn't find it, just got more scared. I mean, when "The Google" is in on the conspiracy, too, and tries to tell you that maybe you are really looking for is some totally insane word nobody's ever heard of, like "oligarchy," then you know it's time to hit the streets with full auto's blazing!!!!

White folks, hide under your beds! The Oligarhy is coming! Hide your children! Destroy your Social Security card and the implant in it they track you with!!! Hide your funny men, the ones with soft things on their chests and the ability to bear children even though you can't, a strange and frightening fact that you just don't understand even though every day you give birth to little dirt babies so why can't you make real babies! It's a sad puzzle! The Oligarhy is coming!

I hope it brings ice cream.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Angry White Racist Commended by Senator

It reads like an Onion headline, but it's true...

Now that Glenn Beck is on the run, maybe we can do something about Senator "Wally"!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Rise Like Lions, Shake Your Chains!

I'm no big fan of the Kennedy clan, kids. But I'm no ogre either and my sympathies go out to them on their loss today. Probably, like you, I can't claim any personal feelings of loss as I never met Sen. Kennedy, but we can all relate to the loss of a family member. At least they had time to be with him and knew this day was coming. For one family, they've had many sudden losses.

I can't help but hope, though - and I think Sen. Kennedy might not be adverse to this - that the Democrats will be strengthened by his passing rather than weakened. With renewed vigor and a desire to "Do It for Teddy!" they can return to Washington and get a real health care package passed in both houses of Congress. NOW IS THE TIME!

I know Kennedy was a great believer in compromise, but there is no room for compromise in health care. We have to have it and we have to have a public option. Without a public option, health care will only further subsidize the insurance companies, providing no leverage for the people to use against them - and our tax money will pay for it.

With a public option, we can fight. Because this is a fight, for our rights. I believe that health care is a fundamental right in America - let's call it something catchy like "promoting the general welfare," eh? - and NOW IS THE TIME!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Chuckie Alert - Defcon 6

I'm happy to note that Chuck Norris, a leading intellectual light of the right, has come out with a smashing expose of Obama's health care plan:


Yes, according to Chuck, Obama shouldn't be tarred and feathered for his heinous plan which will create death panels, institutionalize euthanasia and steal children from their homes in the dead of night (yes, he really thinks that).

The guy really behind it all is: Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel.

A Jew.

You can read all of Chuck's babblings if you really want to do so - but you needn't bother reading past Dr. Emanuel's last name. All Chuck really wants is for his brain-dead legion of zombie readers to note the name. And quake in fear.

Because Chuck Knows that They Know what a name like Emanuel means:


I'm not gonna put up any links to any sites that discuss the NWO and the JC (hey, aren't those Jesus' initials, too?) because they are morally repugnant. You can find them very easily if you wish.

And it's really pointless to even post a comment on the Human Events' website because they censor them. One of mine showed up once. Not one since. Feel free to comment away here, though. I don't censor or block my comments and I try to respond to all, regardless of level of insanity.

Oh, and Chuck - burn in hell!

Second That (E)Motion

I'm with Grandpa Simpson - "I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missourah."

But I do applaud the Springfield News-Leader for kicking the grouty butt of Roy Blount when he was caught REPEATEDLY lying to a newspaper editorial board about health care reform. Kudos to them and the diarist at Daily Kos who's spreading the word about Roy "It's not a lie if I say it's not! Really, I think I remember that somebody might maybe have told me this! Really!!!!" Blount.

If you think my hatred of Missouri petty and childish, please go and live there for four years. Then we'll talk. They didn't call them "Pukes" in the previous to last century for nothin', kids.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Lying Liars and Their Lies

Glenn "Gotta Love them Nazis" Beck is at again. As advertisers pull out of his show in droves, he lies again today. Here's a video of him showing a Nazi eugenics poster and telling his audience what it says. But he lies about what it says, claiming it characterizes the person in the chair as "a sweet guy" and discusses his "quality of life." It doesn't. This is Beck broadening the lie to make it more sickly sweet and easier to slid down the gullible gullets of his viewers.

Don't get me wrong: This is still an evil, nasty piece of graphic propaganda made by evil, nasty people, but Beck distorts it and twists it for his own propaganda purposes. I think that's officially a "Double Bad Evil Thing."

Sign the petition to urge Beck's sponsors to dump him. It feels good. You're a "sweet guy" if you do it. A Nazi if you don't. Really. Just ask Glenn if you don't believe me.

Monday, August 10, 2009

In Case You Missed Something...

If you're new here or just lazy (yeah! lazy!), here's every live show I've posted. I think. Maybe I missed one or two. And there may be a surprise in there. I can't be bothered to check. I'm too busy polishing my monocle.


A Milestone of Fatherhood

Had to happen eventually. And I made it as fun as possible. But...

I taught The Boy how to shave yesterday.

He's growing up and I'm growing old.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Now Is the Time

You need to go and listen to Glenn "I Have Life-Size Appliques of Hitler, Goebbels and Goering on the Mirrored Ceiling Over My Bed" Beck issue a literal call-to-arms to his crazy listeners.

And listen carefully, because Glenn "I didn't say anything of the sort!" Beck couches his call to armed revolt and treason very carefully. By saying it's "not time" for it. The unspoken "yet" lingers heavily in the crazy ear.

I dunno if Beck is purely delusional, a real true believer, or just a cynical, manipulative, vicious propagandist. I do think that he is a deeply hate-filled man and I can almost have pity for him except that he chooses to use his hatred to push the buttons of the unhinged and the racist, hoping against hope that one of them will do the dirty deed, that one of them will pull the trigger he hopes will get pulled.

Unlike Beck, I think NOW IS THE TIME! - time to start fighting back against this kind of vileness. How about a boycott for starters?
  • Don't listen to any radio station that broadcasts his propaganda show and let them know about it, too. Just turning off the radio is meaningless.
  • Boycott any sponsor of either his radio or TV programs.
  • Boycott his publisher, too. Don't buy any book from Simon & Schuster, the parent company of Threshold Editions, Beck's publisher.
  • Boycott the parent company of Simon & Schuster - CBS! Don't watch any program on CBS.
  • AND LET THEM KNOW - via phone or email or letter or picket line!
  • Hit the bastards in the only place that matters - their pocket books! Nothing else will motivate any of Beck's corporate protectors to distance themselves from him.
It's really funny, now, seeing the tree of corporate protectionism that sponsors Beck's hatred, since he bills himself as a man of the people, a voice for the voiceless, just a neighborhood Joe who's fighting the good fight against the powers that be. Without those powers, he is powerless, he is voiceless, he is nothing.

Let's make sure of that, eh?

Bye-bye, Beck, bye-bye!

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

The Moustache Suits You!

Adolf Boehner, anyone?

Congressional Thug for Hire, aka, House Minority Leader John Boehner (R - for Rotten), is happily endorsing the Nazi-styled thuggery and intimidation tactics promoted by the (laugh whenever you say or write the name, you just have to! Tea Baggers.

Receiving their cell instructions from their secret leaders, the Tea Baggers are using brownshirt bullying to disrupt public discourse in the name of...tea bags? And Johnny Boy Boehner is right with 'em, kids! (For more reason and less sarcasm, read this or this).

When not bathing in bronzing solution, Rep. Boehner enjoys destroying American institutions, vanilla ice cream, white bread, mayo, Mein Kampf (abridged audio version only), kicking puppies and wondering what Nazi heaven is like and if he's enough of a true believer to someday see it.

Happy Birthday, Mr. President

Happy Birthday, President Obama!

Please don't turn into the Anti-Christ and kill us all.

(Happy thoughts, everybody, happy thoughts!!!)

Thank you.

Monday, August 3, 2009

When Crazy Does TV

When Michelle Malkin starts talking about government cheese and basically saying that people prefer unemployment to, I dunno - eating? - I want to puke. I also want to ask her this:

"Miss (surely Ms. is not appropriate?) Malkin - have you ever been unemployed? Have you ever lost your job due to downsizing? Have you ever tried to feed a family of four on unemployment benefits? Have you ever been up at 3am, shaking with the sweats, crying, wondering what you were going to do when your unemployment benefits run out - how you'd keep your children from starving? Have you ever tried to get a job when there are no jobs to be gotten? Have you, ever, in your entire life, suffered a single privation due to lack of economic resources?"

I know the answer already and so do you. I also know that someone like Miss Malkin wouldn't even let me ask her a question like this. She'd scream about "welfare mothers driving Cadillacs" (the Republicans and the conservatives are so old school) and "Socialists! Communists! Feminists! Leftists!" until - she would hope - I would go away and stop confronting her idealogy with reality. Because the two don't mix and it hurts her brain to deal with them equally.

Advice to Michelle Malkin: Cognitive dissonance may hurt a little but millions of unemployed and starving Americans would rather face that than what they wake up to every morning.

You're a lucky person, Miss Malkin. You don't have the problems real Americans have. I almost envy you.