Saturday, December 19, 2009

Once a Quitter...

Always a quitter!

Sarah Palin even quits her own vacation!

Bwahahahahahahahahaha! Bwahahahahahahahahaha! Bwahahahahahahahahaha!

I guess someone forgot to tell her that only elitist socialist America-haters vacation in our 50th state.

I'm going to be sick; this is too funny.

Friday, December 18, 2009

He's Baaaack!

Funnier than The Onion! More deluded than Red State! Able to leap wild rings around logic and intelligent thought!

It's....Jesus? Again???

Give Me an "F"!!!

American traitor, Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-Okla.), flew bravely across the big scary ocean in a shiny warm aeroplane, with a bunch of his closest aides - evidently people who help Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-Okla.) breathe and tie his shoes - to a widdle-biddle teeny-weeny northern country this week.

Why? We dunno. Except that he thinks someone is pulling his leg about science things. And he likes to look like a big man.

Sadly, no one paid any attention to him and the couple of reporters who wandered by during his "speech" spent more time trying to figure out how to spell his name than report on what he said.

One "F" or two? I know what "F" I'm giving him. And it's a big one.


Less snarkily, if a Democratic Senator had done something similar while Bush reigned supreme, going to another country where our President was speakifying importantly, just to slam his policies and take our internal politics across outside our borders...well, he or she would have been crucified by the right and the Rethuglicans and the media would have spent days reacting in horror.

Today, as my trolls like to say, crickets. IOKIYAR, ain't it. At least one thing never changes.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Is There a Doctor in the House?

With all the brouhaha about "health care reform," I thought maybe we could all use some real doctoring...

Plus, I just bought a bunch of vintage late 60s issues of Strange Tales (including this beauty below) at a junk shop for a buck each and have been lovin' the livin' daylights out of them!

Did anyone besides me watch this back in 1978? I remember loving and hating it because it was so cool that there was the possibility of a Dr. Strange TV series (this was supposed to be the pilot, really) but the tight 'fro on the guy playing the Dr. looked too sitcom-bit-player and not awesome scary magic guy-ish. That hair really pissed me off.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Hello, Larry!

When's Lawrence O'Donnell getting his own show? This clip is awesome - he puts his boot so far up the entire lying Cheney family's collective butt Lawrence will have to have it amputated at the hip to free himself.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Orange You Glad...


"No time to read the big long bill of many pages, but it's trash. And we can do better. You just wait! We'll show you! Really, we will. Seriously. Next week...Can I go now?"
I love the enthusiasm in his voice. He's already thinking of the tanning bed.

Holy Health Care, Batman!

I keep getting Rep. Alan Grayson confused with boy-wonder and nighttime pajama-wearing superhero Dick Grayson. Mom should never have put the B&W in the crib, I guess.

Check out new superhero Grayson speaking truth in Congress. I think the walls shook a bit at the unexpected introduction of reality.

And here's a freebie idea for DC-area fans of Grayson, the truth and health-care reform:

Get the names of the dead lost to lack of health care and go to Congress and politely walk along-side every entering and exiting member of Congress - Republican and Democrat, Senator and Representative - and read their names aloud.

Don't harass, don't yell, don't scream. Just politely and firmly read their names. Let them be remembered. Let their deaths not be in vain.

Remind the bastards that this is literally about life and death and it's their responsibility as our elected leaders to do something about it.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Honor Past Due

I'd like to propose a Constitutional Amendment:

"The President of the United States of America shall be required to personally honor every citizen-soldier fallen in the service of his or her country during that President's term of office. Such act will include but not be limited to the President's presence at the return of the physical remains of every soldier to American soil. There shall be no exceptions."

President Obama took responsibility this morning for his actions. George Bush never had the guts to do this.

How will the right attack him for it? Let us count the ways....

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Before Your Eyes...

Open this in multiple windows and hit play over and over again, waiting a random amount of time between the start of each play.

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Have a nice weekend!

Friday, October 9, 2009

And One for Barry White

Just another affirmative action notch in Barry Obama's belt this morning, kids - a stupid Nobel Prize for Peace.

You know what this means, right? Conspiracy. You know it and you should fear it! Today, the Nobel Prize committee conspired with the NWO Party Planning committee and the Never Give a White Guy a Break Breakfast Club to take our country away!

By country, of course, I mean Norway. Barry's now hoodwinked the Norwegians! Can you believe it - the Norwegians! Those poor, pale people. What did they ever do to him, besides being born pink and probably very cold.


This morning's blog post has been brought to you by the Demon Alliance of Glenn Beck's Head. If you've enjoyed the Demon Alliance of Glenn Beck's Head, please take a moment to express your appreciation. Thank you!

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Eternal Lie

"Guns don't kill people..."

Right, it's people who illegally sell guns to people who can't legally buy them that kill people!

Gun Control. Now.

And just shut the hell up to all you crazy-ass right to bear arms freaks. We've had the discussion before. You lost as far as I'm concerned. Won't have it again.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

What Would Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus Do?

It's like Christmas, the presents just keep coming.

Now, the folks what are always telling us that every word of The Bible is literal, unchanging truth and should be adhered to like glue...are rewriting The Bible. Or at least the part that matters, the one with Jeebus in it. See, it's too liberal and they need to make it more conservative.

Stop laughing! I'm serious! Really, hahahahahaha they are hahahahahahaha rewriting hahahahahaha The hahahahahahaha Bible!

Just like Jefferson did. I'm sure. I bet they're going to create a humanist text revealing the core philosophy of Christ, stripping out every reference to the divinity of Christ and the supernatural (miracles, etc) and get back to the basic message of the King of Peace!

Well, amen, I say! Hallelujah! Right on, brothers and sisters!

Oh, this just in. The word "peace" will no longer be in the Jeebus Part. Here's Rule #4 these Think-O-Maniacs came up with:
4. Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop;[4] defective translations use the word "comrade" three times as often as "volunteer"; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as "word", "peace", and "miracle".
I'm gonna be sick. Hahahahahahahahahahahapuke.

[Can someone 'splain to me, please, what's wrong with "miracle"? I get "word" - it's got "urban" ie black connotations now. Jeebus didn't like the black folks, we all know. And "peace" has been all crazied up by people who want, uh, peace in the world. Bastards! Stoopid liberals ruining a perfectly good word - um, I mean, collection of letters representing an idea or thing or action. But "miracle"? My money is on a fracked-up association with homosexuality but I'm probably wrong. What am I missing? "Miracle on ice"? Do conservatives hate hockey too?]

UPDATE: Here's what Conservapedia says on the "librul outrage" over their proposed bastardization of the Good Book:
Liberal hypocrisy anyone? In their condemnation of the Conservative Bible Translation Project, the critics have forgotten their praise for last year's "Green Bible", an eco-friendly edition made from recycled paper, processed soy ink, and the words of nature - not Christ - in green.
Gosh. I never thought of it like that. Printing some words in an edition of The Bible in green while others are not in green is EXACTLY like editing it to conform to your twisted, hateful, mean-spirited, homophobic, racist, sexist political agenda! Exactly. No difference. Libruls is stoopid.

UPDATE DOS: I'm so seriously amused by this, I can't stop reading about it or sharing it. Here's the Conservapedia timeline on accomplishing their exalted mission:
How long would this project take? There are about 8000 verses in the New Testament. At a careful rate of translating about four verses an hour, it would take one person 2000 hours, or about one year working full time on the project.
So, if they get, like, 2000 dedicated conservative Bible-istas, they can have this whole thing done in ONE hour!

By the power of Grayskull! Bastardize thine Holiest of Holies!


LAST UPDATE (PROMISE!): In the midst of all my rabid amusement over this stunning announcement, I missed this example of the type of change they intend to inflict on the New Testament, which actually tempers my pleasure somewhat (from the Conservapedia project page):

First Example - Liberal Falsehood

The earliest, most authentic manuscripts lack this verse set forth at Luke 23:34:[7]

Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

Is this a liberal corruption of the original? This does not appear in any other Gospel, and the simple fact is that some of the persecutors of Jesus did know what they were doing. This quotation is a favorite of liberals but should not appear in a conservative Bible.

Really. Seriously. They are removing as liberal propaganda one of the loveliest and most touching verses in the New Testament, a line that has always made me stop and think about how I treat other human beings, about how my own ignorance can hurt others and how I need to temper my anger and slow my wrath and stop being as critical as I know I can be without knowledge of another's heart (everywhere except on this blog, of course). A line, too, that in the King James is one of the sweetest sounding verses to ever roll from human lips. The cadence and sonority of "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do" makes me weep, it is so lovely. It's a poem in and of itself.

And doesn't it seem like they are praising the executioners of Christ while putting down Jesus at the same time? Assuming an historical personage like Jesus Christ ever existed, of course. Which I doubt. What are we looking at here? Did Nancy Pelosi invent a time machine, travel back about 2000 years and somehow manage - with the vast knowledge of ancient Middle Eastern languages one must assume she has, as the Anti-Christ's Playmate - to sneak this totally anachronist crazy liberal verse into a draft version of Luke? It's very strange, very WTF.

But why? Well, by comparison why is pretty easy to understand. See my previous post. This is the New Christianity at work. A Christianity without pity. Without compassion. Without love. Everything else, I guess, is just fear.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Blessed Be the Dicks

Michael Moore has a diary post up on DailyKos this morning, about his faith and Jesus and capitalism. In sum, he writes that Jesus wouldn't approve of capitalism because it sacrifices the poor for the benefit of the wealthy. And I think he's fundamentally right about this.

Problem is, that's an outdated and sadly old-fashioned view of Christianity that Michael's carrying around. He needs to get hip, get now, get with the program!

The NEW Christianity says fuck the poor. Jesus only loves you if you are rich. Jesus only cares about you if you are powerful. Jesus will welcome you at the gates of Heaven himself, but only if you accrue wealth and power and abuse the privileges of such to the fullest during your mortal life span. The poor and the powerless, being poor and powerless, have no right to pity or mercy or the blessings of God. If they did, they'd be rich and powerful. Ergo...

I'm not making this up out of whole cloth, kids. This is modern-age Christianity - circa 1935 on. Read The Family and you'll finally be able to understand why the wealthy and powerful seem like such dicks. Because they think they have the right be to be dicks. The heavenly right to be dicks. The heavenly right to do whatever they want, damn the consequences, because there are no consequences. Screw morality! Screw ethics! In fact, there are no morals or ethics to screw in the New Christianity, because morals and ethics are the petty rules of the poor and powerless and Old Christianity, meant to constrain the rich and powerful and prevent them from heedlessly trampling upon the poor and powerless. (Does your head hurt yet?) Therefore they must and can be safely ignored in the pursuit of wealth and power. 'Cuz Jesus say so.

"Blessed be the dicks."

So ends the sermon for this Sunday, October 4, in the year of His Blessed Savageness, 2009. Amen and go with Raptor Jesus! May his teeth shine light upon the wicked in the darkness and his claws rend justice unto the deserving!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Grandma! Where Ya Been?

More old monkey bones discovered!

Thank you, Science, for kicking in the teeth of creationism once again. You're a pal.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The Haters Keep On Hating

Why do the Democrats hate America? Why do they believe that the health of corporate persons* is more important than the health of real flesh and blood Americans? Why do they constantly kowtow to the childish whining of Republicans?

In the Senate today, a bunch of mealy, sad, pathetic Democrats sided with a bunch of Republicans today to shut down a fiscally responsible public option plan that would have provided decent health care to millions of Americans.

Why? Why? Why?

Only today I was confronted by the inequities of the American non-health care system as it stands. One of my students has had multiple hospital visits in the last two weeks resulting in multiple hospital bills; a parent is recovering from major surgery and unemployed because of it; grandparents are in a care facility; healthy parent also unemployed thanks to the depths of the depression we are in. My student is the only working member of the family. At a fast food joint. And this family will be losing their home soon because of the almost impossible financial burdens of medical care they have experienced in just the last year.

Why? Why? Why?

* Have you ever met a corporate person? Me neither. Sounds like the bogeyman of all bogeymen to me, Stephen King's red-headed step-child with a dull axe.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

My Seventh Organ

I can''t tell you much about how I became such a rabid fan of Ben Chesney and Six Organs of Admittance. But if you haven't heard Ben or SOoA, think John Fahey meets VU. That should have you running to Walmart!

All I can remember is reading about a review of a SOoA album in an issue of Ptolemaic Terrascope and knowing that I must hear this band with the super cool, super hard to remember name. Whatever the reviewer wrote fired me up completely. Pretty sure the album was Dust and Chimes. Back then, in the early days of online music, I had a subscription to Emusic, when they still allowed unlimited downloads every month. Boy, did I ever abuse that service! I still have about a hundred CDRs full of 128-bit MP3 albums I downloaded. If I thought I might wanna hear it, BAM! Whether or not SOoA was an Emusic find, I don't know, but there was a lot of great stuff from labels like VHF available.

Hmm...I remember twenty years ago better than ten and both much better than last week.

Anyway, well, um, however many years later or so I'm still a rabid fan. The new album is incredible. Buy it. Buy all their albums. NOW!

Monday, September 21, 2009

The Sound of Fear

This is the sound of frightened old white men. It's beautiful music, kids, bee-yoo-ti-full!!!

Friday, September 18, 2009

Prayers Come True

Though the music I've presented here may not reflect it, I'm not mired in the musical past. I started this blog to try share some of the live music I've collected over the years by the artists that strongly affected me in my youth. And overall, it's been fairly successful, for me at least. Fun too.

But I don't live in the past. I keep my mystical ears wired as much as possible. During the 90s this was terribly frustrating because My Smart Wife and I were physically and culturally isolated, living in Kirksville, Missouri for the middle chunk of that decade.

Kirksville ain't a bad town, but our circumstances limited our appreciation of and enjoyment of it and Missouri considerably. Basically, we was broke. Poor almost. We sometimes used milk crates for furniture and prayed that when a relative visited there might be an old chair or used TV tucked in the back of their vehicle for us. That and cheese and beer - we always prayed for cheese and beer. Couldn't buy the former (not good cheese) in Kirksville and couldn't afford the latter. I remember how wicked and conspicuously consumptive we felt once buying an 8-pack (yes, EIGHT PACK!) of Rhinelander at $1.98. *

So, in those heady Pre-Internet-Is-Every-Goddamn-Where Days it was hard to find out about new music. I felt starved, wasted! That started to change after we added The Boy to our household and one of my brothers gave me his old Mac in exchange for a refurbished Kirby vacuum cleaner (oh, Kirby - what can't you do!) and we got our first dial-in connection to the college My Smart Wife worked at.

My kaleidoscope eyes were opened wide! It really didn't take me long at all to find out that there were many other freaks like me out there - you know who you are!!! - and after suffering in isolation across the country, across the world, for so long we now had found a tool to reach out to our freaky brethren.

One of the first online discussion groups I joined was Drone On, devoted to new music, to "drone" - whatever that is; still trying to figure it out - and weirdness in general. I freakin' ate it up! I read every post, every thread - though I hadn't a clue what the bands they were talking about really sounded like. Kirksville had a used CD/book/magazine/porn/head shop but even if a used CD by one of these weirdly named bands (Bardo Pond? WTF?) had shown up, I didn't have the 7 bucks to buy it. I had a baby to feed, dammit!

I began to create fantasy symphonies in my head, based on the band names and the album titles and the ecstatic descriptions of the music by the different posters. I ached to hear the real thing, though I feared I'd be sorely disappointed when I did. Finally, I started to connect with some listers and they pitied me and sent me compilation tapes (tapes!!!).

Wow - there was some mighty cool shit being laid down and my imaginary tunes weren't half as weird and fun as the real thing.

And then one lucky day we found ourselves on a rare outing to Columbia, home of the University of Missouri and a couple of decent record stores. It was a splurge day. Pizza out, new work clothes for My Smart Wife and something for me. I'd been scrimping and hoarding for months and had almost 20 bucks to blow! Big spender, big spender.

I was freakin' out though, because all I saw was the same old crap, nothing new, nothing weird or droney enough to satisfy my new compulsions. I had a list with me of all the bands that got talked about on the Drone On list and couldn't find any of them at the little weird record stores. Finally, just before we left town, I went to a chain CD store, my expectations lower than my arches.

It was my saving grace. First CD I saw, I bought - Amanita by Bardo Pond. That was all I bought because it took all my monies. Loved the cover, loved the "feel" of it, the vibe it gave off. Though godless, I was praying - praying it wouldn't be total crap, praying I hadn't just wasted my cash.

My prayers came true. First note, first rumbling scree and first emerging roar, first thud and first whomp - everything I suspected might be true about a band that gave itself such a cool name was really true. I almost cried. Beautiful, so beautiful.

That was the start of my delirious affair with Bardo Pond, the late psychedelic love of my life. If you haven't, go now to visit them, to bathe in the sacred wine and traipse through the holy groves with John, Michael, Isobel, Clint and Ed. Order some tunes and some cool t-shirts. Tell Michael that gomonkeygo sent ya.

* I do not endorse the drinking of Rhinelander beer nor its use for medicinal or cleaning purposes of any kind, regardless of its incredibly abrasive qualities and assumed industrial uses.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

People Who Died

When I was student teaching, a young sophomore girl in one of the history classes I was teaching at a very small rural high school was reading The Basketball Diaries. She was a bit of an outsider, let's say. Smart, funny, weird, literate - my kind of kid.

I made her day, became her favorite teacher ever (I exaggerate, to make myself feel better) by asking her how she liked it. She was amazed I knew the book, that I'd read it and even more amazed when I started telling her about his poetry and his music. She didn't know Carroll was also a singer - I told her about this song, one of my all-time faves.

So, for making a small-town girl feel better, Jim - thank you. For helping me make a connection with a great kid, thank you. I still see her around town, in fact I expect I'll be seeing her next week. We have something, someone, to talk about again.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Seeing Red!

Comrade Obama has abandoned the party, fellow workers of the state! We have been hoodwinked and played for fools!!!

Yes, it's true. The White House (oh, when did it turn from Red?) has released the text of "President" Obama's speech to our nation's children he intends to give tomorrow.

And there is not a word of socialist/communist/leftist propaganda in it! We've been betrayed!

Nothing about the Twelve-Year Plan (for terms one, two and three of Obama's Thousand-Year Rule) or collectivization of farms and government takeover of utilities and health care. Nary a hint of the forced sterilization of Whitey and the wholescale slaughter of Granny! Nothing about working for the Leader! Nothing about the "Summer Camps" for the enemies of the State. Nothing about the Youth Army at all - what kind of speech is this?

The children, the poor children. They are leaderless...

I'm afraid the dream is over, comrades. Return to your cells and plot anew. The revolution has been cancelled.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

What Would Jeebus Do?

I almost wish the fantasy of Christianity were true and a space-god would return to judge us all. Because if it's that hippie from the New Testament, then he's gonna go Manson. All over so-called Christians like this guy and this guy. Not too forget this dude.

All preachers of the word. And the word is "Kill!" They all are publicly preaching about and praying for the death of President Barack Obama.

Lovely people. True believers. Scum of the earth.

Everyday I hope to hear good things come from the mouths, minds and hearts of the religious, the kind of things that my own pastor used to say, about charity and loving others and forgiveness. Everyday I'm disappointed. Everyday I'm more convinced of the irrationality of all religion and I'm confirmed in my belief that we need to grow past it to survive.

Maybe I should look into Scientology. If Beck likes it...

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Here's a blast to keep you sane from Nazz Nomad.

It's a Caterwaul of Sound, man, a Caterwaul!!!!

Love the bridge or the chorus or whatever it is. Awesome.

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Craaaazy! Ev'rywhere You Go!

Man, I was gonna write about sitcoms today. Seriously. I'm always wanting to write about sitcoms. In fact, I've always wanted to write for sitcoms but that's a whole 'nother story.

Instead, I bring you...VERY ANGRY WHITE FOLKS! Yeah! Anger! Yeah! White! Yeah! White? Not much else to say except I really need to talk to the genuis at about one minute twenty seconds, who somehow managed to distort the space-time continuum and put a several hundred year old wooden warship inside of a small paper pamphlet! This guy's our next Einstein, I tells ya!

Did I mention crazy? Seriously, these folks have opened the Crazy Door, put out the Crazy Welcome Mat and stocked the Crazy Fridge full of Crazy Cola for the Big Crazy Party.

Personally, I don't hate them. I actually feel great pity for them. They are scared because the man in the White House ain't white no more. And evidently that's the only sense of identity they have. Their lives are meaningless without the prop of their skin color. Very sad. But they only get one boo-hoo from me and that was it.

Bye, crazies!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Crazy Super Train

Glenn Beck is gonna tell us all what we can do. To stop the Obama "Oligarhy"!!!

Now, I don't know what an "oligarhy" is (though it's pronounced, according to Glenn, like a word that should be spelled "oligarchy" - go figure!) but I'm quakin' in my size 11 and a half, nearly triple-E boots. Actually, Birkenstocks, but boots if I owned some. Check it out...

I have to hand it to the little freak, though. He's really masterful at the fine art of riling scared folks up into a frenzy. I'm guessing nine-tenths of his viewers spent a couple hours trying to Google "Oligarhy" and when they couldn't find it, just got more scared. I mean, when "The Google" is in on the conspiracy, too, and tries to tell you that maybe you are really looking for is some totally insane word nobody's ever heard of, like "oligarchy," then you know it's time to hit the streets with full auto's blazing!!!!

White folks, hide under your beds! The Oligarhy is coming! Hide your children! Destroy your Social Security card and the implant in it they track you with!!! Hide your funny men, the ones with soft things on their chests and the ability to bear children even though you can't, a strange and frightening fact that you just don't understand even though every day you give birth to little dirt babies so why can't you make real babies! It's a sad puzzle! The Oligarhy is coming!

I hope it brings ice cream.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Angry White Racist Commended by Senator

It reads like an Onion headline, but it's true...

Now that Glenn Beck is on the run, maybe we can do something about Senator "Wally"!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Rise Like Lions, Shake Your Chains!

I'm no big fan of the Kennedy clan, kids. But I'm no ogre either and my sympathies go out to them on their loss today. Probably, like you, I can't claim any personal feelings of loss as I never met Sen. Kennedy, but we can all relate to the loss of a family member. At least they had time to be with him and knew this day was coming. For one family, they've had many sudden losses.

I can't help but hope, though - and I think Sen. Kennedy might not be adverse to this - that the Democrats will be strengthened by his passing rather than weakened. With renewed vigor and a desire to "Do It for Teddy!" they can return to Washington and get a real health care package passed in both houses of Congress. NOW IS THE TIME!

I know Kennedy was a great believer in compromise, but there is no room for compromise in health care. We have to have it and we have to have a public option. Without a public option, health care will only further subsidize the insurance companies, providing no leverage for the people to use against them - and our tax money will pay for it.

With a public option, we can fight. Because this is a fight, for our rights. I believe that health care is a fundamental right in America - let's call it something catchy like "promoting the general welfare," eh? - and NOW IS THE TIME!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Chuckie Alert - Defcon 6

I'm happy to note that Chuck Norris, a leading intellectual light of the right, has come out with a smashing expose of Obama's health care plan:


Yes, according to Chuck, Obama shouldn't be tarred and feathered for his heinous plan which will create death panels, institutionalize euthanasia and steal children from their homes in the dead of night (yes, he really thinks that).

The guy really behind it all is: Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel.

A Jew.

You can read all of Chuck's babblings if you really want to do so - but you needn't bother reading past Dr. Emanuel's last name. All Chuck really wants is for his brain-dead legion of zombie readers to note the name. And quake in fear.

Because Chuck Knows that They Know what a name like Emanuel means:


I'm not gonna put up any links to any sites that discuss the NWO and the JC (hey, aren't those Jesus' initials, too?) because they are morally repugnant. You can find them very easily if you wish.

And it's really pointless to even post a comment on the Human Events' website because they censor them. One of mine showed up once. Not one since. Feel free to comment away here, though. I don't censor or block my comments and I try to respond to all, regardless of level of insanity.

Oh, and Chuck - burn in hell!

Second That (E)Motion

I'm with Grandpa Simpson - "I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missourah."

But I do applaud the Springfield News-Leader for kicking the grouty butt of Roy Blount when he was caught REPEATEDLY lying to a newspaper editorial board about health care reform. Kudos to them and the diarist at Daily Kos who's spreading the word about Roy "It's not a lie if I say it's not! Really, I think I remember that somebody might maybe have told me this! Really!!!!" Blount.

If you think my hatred of Missouri petty and childish, please go and live there for four years. Then we'll talk. They didn't call them "Pukes" in the previous to last century for nothin', kids.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Lying Liars and Their Lies

Glenn "Gotta Love them Nazis" Beck is at again. As advertisers pull out of his show in droves, he lies again today. Here's a video of him showing a Nazi eugenics poster and telling his audience what it says. But he lies about what it says, claiming it characterizes the person in the chair as "a sweet guy" and discusses his "quality of life." It doesn't. This is Beck broadening the lie to make it more sickly sweet and easier to slid down the gullible gullets of his viewers.

Don't get me wrong: This is still an evil, nasty piece of graphic propaganda made by evil, nasty people, but Beck distorts it and twists it for his own propaganda purposes. I think that's officially a "Double Bad Evil Thing."

Sign the petition to urge Beck's sponsors to dump him. It feels good. You're a "sweet guy" if you do it. A Nazi if you don't. Really. Just ask Glenn if you don't believe me.

Monday, August 10, 2009

In Case You Missed Something...

If you're new here or just lazy (yeah! lazy!), here's every live show I've posted. I think. Maybe I missed one or two. And there may be a surprise in there. I can't be bothered to check. I'm too busy polishing my monocle.


A Milestone of Fatherhood

Had to happen eventually. And I made it as fun as possible. But...

I taught The Boy how to shave yesterday.

He's growing up and I'm growing old.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Now Is the Time

You need to go and listen to Glenn "I Have Life-Size Appliques of Hitler, Goebbels and Goering on the Mirrored Ceiling Over My Bed" Beck issue a literal call-to-arms to his crazy listeners.

And listen carefully, because Glenn "I didn't say anything of the sort!" Beck couches his call to armed revolt and treason very carefully. By saying it's "not time" for it. The unspoken "yet" lingers heavily in the crazy ear.

I dunno if Beck is purely delusional, a real true believer, or just a cynical, manipulative, vicious propagandist. I do think that he is a deeply hate-filled man and I can almost have pity for him except that he chooses to use his hatred to push the buttons of the unhinged and the racist, hoping against hope that one of them will do the dirty deed, that one of them will pull the trigger he hopes will get pulled.

Unlike Beck, I think NOW IS THE TIME! - time to start fighting back against this kind of vileness. How about a boycott for starters?
  • Don't listen to any radio station that broadcasts his propaganda show and let them know about it, too. Just turning off the radio is meaningless.
  • Boycott any sponsor of either his radio or TV programs.
  • Boycott his publisher, too. Don't buy any book from Simon & Schuster, the parent company of Threshold Editions, Beck's publisher.
  • Boycott the parent company of Simon & Schuster - CBS! Don't watch any program on CBS.
  • AND LET THEM KNOW - via phone or email or letter or picket line!
  • Hit the bastards in the only place that matters - their pocket books! Nothing else will motivate any of Beck's corporate protectors to distance themselves from him.
It's really funny, now, seeing the tree of corporate protectionism that sponsors Beck's hatred, since he bills himself as a man of the people, a voice for the voiceless, just a neighborhood Joe who's fighting the good fight against the powers that be. Without those powers, he is powerless, he is voiceless, he is nothing.

Let's make sure of that, eh?

Bye-bye, Beck, bye-bye!

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

The Moustache Suits You!

Adolf Boehner, anyone?

Congressional Thug for Hire, aka, House Minority Leader John Boehner (R - for Rotten), is happily endorsing the Nazi-styled thuggery and intimidation tactics promoted by the (laugh whenever you say or write the name, you just have to! Tea Baggers.

Receiving their cell instructions from their secret leaders, the Tea Baggers are using brownshirt bullying to disrupt public discourse in the name of...tea bags? And Johnny Boy Boehner is right with 'em, kids! (For more reason and less sarcasm, read this or this).

When not bathing in bronzing solution, Rep. Boehner enjoys destroying American institutions, vanilla ice cream, white bread, mayo, Mein Kampf (abridged audio version only), kicking puppies and wondering what Nazi heaven is like and if he's enough of a true believer to someday see it.

Happy Birthday, Mr. President

Happy Birthday, President Obama!

Please don't turn into the Anti-Christ and kill us all.

(Happy thoughts, everybody, happy thoughts!!!)

Thank you.

Monday, August 3, 2009

When Crazy Does TV

When Michelle Malkin starts talking about government cheese and basically saying that people prefer unemployment to, I dunno - eating? - I want to puke. I also want to ask her this:

"Miss (surely Ms. is not appropriate?) Malkin - have you ever been unemployed? Have you ever lost your job due to downsizing? Have you ever tried to feed a family of four on unemployment benefits? Have you ever been up at 3am, shaking with the sweats, crying, wondering what you were going to do when your unemployment benefits run out - how you'd keep your children from starving? Have you ever tried to get a job when there are no jobs to be gotten? Have you, ever, in your entire life, suffered a single privation due to lack of economic resources?"

I know the answer already and so do you. I also know that someone like Miss Malkin wouldn't even let me ask her a question like this. She'd scream about "welfare mothers driving Cadillacs" (the Republicans and the conservatives are so old school) and "Socialists! Communists! Feminists! Leftists!" until - she would hope - I would go away and stop confronting her idealogy with reality. Because the two don't mix and it hurts her brain to deal with them equally.

Advice to Michelle Malkin: Cognitive dissonance may hurt a little but millions of unemployed and starving Americans would rather face that than what they wake up to every morning.

You're a lucky person, Miss Malkin. You don't have the problems real Americans have. I almost envy you.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Things That Blow My Mind

This is post 400 on The New Disease. And for a change it's not about politics. Or music (sorry).

It's about graphic design. Sort of. Which I kind of do for a living. Sort of. When I'm not teaching. Not not teaching graphic design. That's not not what I do.

Anyway, I just slipped upon this awesome, groovy blog full of awesome, groovy B-movie/horror posters and movie trailers. Lovely stuff! So much fun! (Like the one above - incredible!)

Knock yer selves out, kids!

Monday, July 20, 2009

It Was Forty Years Ago Today...

When Neil Armstrong taught the world to say "One small step..."

I grew up with the space program and Apollo and NASA and the dream that became reality - men and women living and working in outer space. If my head were to be taken apart by an archaeologist of the mind, one of the lowest and densest strata would be labeled "Space Junk," I'm sure.

If I were old enough to have seen Disney's shows on space exploration, I probably would've been an astronaut rather than an astronut. Instead, I dreamt of space in my Milwaukee Brewer's pajamas during the afternoon naps my Mom made me take even though I fought hard and long against them because I might miss a second of moon landing coverage.

Thank you, Neil and Buzz. Even if you did fake it, it was incredible.

(I just found out that those classic Disney space shows are on DVD. I ordered my copy thirty seconds ago! Check on if you don't want to give Amazon your monies.)

Friday, July 17, 2009

The Boil to be Lanced

Pat Buchanan is a human-boil. I say we stick him with a sharp object and release the foulness. It's for his own good.

I haven't posted in a while because I've been busy in my basement, building a man-sized hideaway fort out of crazy ideas and toothpicks. And busy taking off for beautiful McGregor, Iowa with My Smart Wife for a wonderful mid-week romp. Never been to McGregor before but it's a lovely old river town right at the base of the bluffs on the Mississippi, struggling to survive but with an energy and a will that's inspiring.

So as well as missing a few days of prime posting on all kinds of topics, like how the (R) behind so many Senators' names should stand for (Racist) rather than (Republican), I also missed out on Pat Buchanan's ultimate meltdown about all the brown-skinned people and how they's gonna destroy America.

I was working myself up to my normal monkey frenzy on the topic when I read this on Daily Kos. I think you should too. It puts Pat in perspective and in his filthy little place.

Have a nice day and a great weekend, kids. I'm heading out to put up the signs for our garage sale. Anyone wanna buy a slightly used garage?

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Health Care, Schmealth Care!

Interesting diary post on Daily Kos about a health insurance executive's confession of guilt. Real guilt, as in he actually is feeling an emotion. Hard to believe, I know, but...

But guilt about what? About lying to the American people, about depriving the American people of proper health care, about being a total asshole.

Guilt too about trying to cover up the truth regarding the health care systems of Canada and Britain that are so derided and mocked by the conservative right and their fascist stooges in this country. The kind of truth Michael Moore tried to tell us about with Sicko.

If you have ever dismissed Michael Moore as a demagogue of the left, biased and whacked, read this and think again. There are very powerful, monied interests working very hard to control the media spin on health care. And one of them has just fessed up to it.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Welcome to the Monkey House!

I was just frakkin' around with Google Earth and thought I'd share with you...The Monkey House!

This is the best shot available. A year ago you couldn't even see rooftops, only trees. Maybe in a few more years they'll catch me naked on the roof. For reasons best not gone into. What do your homes look like from space, kids?

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Tears In My Beers

Be sad, be very sad. An angry man becomes a Senator today and America dies. I guess. Maybe. Huh?

I've never known folks that despise the whole culture of the victim as much as the Republicans claim to do, to so thoroughly embrace it and wrap themselves in it like grease on bacon or pigs on trout or whatever homily Sarah Palin would use to describe it. They are getting better at their propaganda though. This a pretty masterful, Goebbels-like misappropriation of images.

Here's to you, Al! Congratulations on your stolen election and your illegitimate Senatorship which begins today. You're scaring the living daylights out of them. Too bad Harry Reid will screw it all up for the Dems. Try to ignore him - he's a tool, a worthless tool, and you'd do better by pretending he doesn't exist. All the Dems would.

Welcome to the world, Senator Franken!

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Happy 4th of July!

Some video for you on America's anniversary. Perhaps my favorite songs each by Thin White Rope and Savage Republic. The lyrics to this SR song echoed in my head many times during the previous Presidential administration. Enjoy!

Goin' to Hell, Real Fast

I'm a bad, bad, bad man for laughing my ass off about this.

Even more so for laughing at this:

Now I really, really, really have to go to the Creation Museum.

Friday, July 3, 2009

The Race Is On!

Sarah Palin just resigned as Governor of Alaska. Yeah. Just a few minutes ago, basically. And she gave a nearly incomprehensible and, I'm sure, deeply coded, speech all about it.

Go ahead, check it out, I'll wait (it's only 1:43)....Okay, here we go!

Near as I can figure it, Palin is running away from her gubernatorial responsibilities, those she was elected to fulfill by the people of the State of Alaska, because she thinks it's too hard a job to do right now. Because of the "new political environment."

"New political environment." Translation: I'm quitting because of Obama and the bad, bad, bad things he's doing - Obama is forcing me to quit. It's all Obama's fault. Blame Obama. Sarah in 2012! (BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! You know, the one that I couldn't write and make money from while still governor? Yeah, that one.)

I think she intends to set herself up for the next few years as the ultimate political outsider, willing to sacrifice all for the good of the (white) people in the fight against evil (aka "That one!"). Things is gonna get even uglier, kids.

I think Little Miss Hitler just threw down the glove.

Big Bang BOOM!!!

I know our local fireworks display won't top this action:

Happy 4th of July weekend, fellow Amerikans and all foreign-type folks everywhere!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

PHASE IV! PHASE IV! We're All Gonna Die!!!

I knew it! I always knew it would be the goddamn ants that do us in. Be afraid, be very afraid...

(Phase IV scared the crap out me when I was ten years old. To a ten year old, it seemed very plausible, indeed. I even read the novelization by Barry Malzberg. You should read some Malzberg if you haven't, btw. Great writer, totally overlooked and undervalued by the majority of science fiction fans, but very cool and weird and depressing and highly literate and so twisted that even science fiction's ghetto which can embrace much has trouble with Malzberg. That makes him worth looking for, I think. I was amazed looking at his bibliography just now; I have almost everything the man's written, fiction-wise at least plus some of the non-fiction. I had no idea I liked Malzberg that much. Go figure!)

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Road Trip?

Anyone wanna join me on a visit to the Creation Museum? Wanna know what it feels like to have centuries of scientific progress thrown out with the bathwater in the name of faith? Wanna feel your very soul shrink within as you witness the evidence of religious nuttery gone mainstream?

Then let's hit the road! I'm more than half serious here, kids. If we can manage four or five willing folk who have the heart to brave the maelstrom of ignorance and fear, then I think we should do it. Whether we travel alone or together, we can meet in Petersburg, KY (is that where they make the Jelly?) and immerse ourselves in the insane for a few hours, test our mettle against the power of Biblical insanity.

Friday, June 26, 2009

A Legend Has Passed

The world musical and bizarre lost one of it's finest and strangest yesterday.

Sky "Sunlight" Saxon passed from our earthly plane Thursday. Or would he have called it Thorsday?

Sky was my first introduction to 60s psychedelia via a New Rose LP in the early 80s. One side recent psych-splatterings that blew my mind because they were so formless and wild and unlike anything I'd ever heard before. One side structured and song-centered, all organs and driving beats.

That record. I barely understood what I was hearing. (Damn, how many times have I written that on this blog!) It was like the first time, a few years later, that I heard Sonic Youth's Bad Moon Rising - a new world was born in my head. In retrospect, that old New Rose LP is not such a hot album. Pretty shitty, really. And the B-side was horribly recorded, probably demos. I tried to listen to it a few years ago and was greatly disappointed. The sounds I heard as a teen didn't exist any more on this piece of vinyl. What happened, what changes occurred in the years along the way to that record and to me - well, that's life.

And Sky had a heckuva life. Whether you loved him for The Seeds or came to him via a different path like I did, you'll miss him.

Adios, Sky! Keep on pushin' too hard, man!